| So today was the day for our amnio test. Had a hard time sleeping last night thinking about today. So we went this morning and waited for what seemed like an eternity before they called us in. They gave us an ultrasound and checked the baby's position. Heard the heartbeat which was strong and consistent. Hoped to find out the sex today but baby was leg locked and would not let us see. So another thing to wait for to find out. Tuesday seems like years away. I dont know how I am going to make it till then. I did alot of reading on amnio's before we had the test done and the whole thing about it not hurting is total bullcrap. That SH!T hurt and when they pulled the liquid out it felt as if they were pulling something inside of me. Luckily the dr performing the amnio was fast. It was over rather quickly definitely not 30 minutes like it says online.
Have spent the rest of the day trying not to think about it and veggin out. I appreciate my family so much more. You know who your friends and family really are at times like this. I love you guys so much your support has been invaluable.
Looking foward to spending time with you guys on Saturday for our tiny teeny ballerinas baby shower. Wow hard to believe she is a grown married woman on the verge of motherhood. I feel so emotional about it I can't imagine how emotional it will be when it is one of my girls having a baby. Even though Ms Remy claims she will not ever have a child. Kind of sounds like a lil neice of mine that use to say the same thing. LOL. So I imagine that will change one day. |
| |
| Ok so I got some disturbing news and I am still digesting it. Well I am now 19 weeks pregnant and had a integrated screening done for genetic disorders. The thought that something could possibly be wrong with my baby never crossed my mind. I have 5 healthy bright children so why wouldnt this one be just as fine. So I get a phone call yesterday morning from my OB telling me I have tested positive risk for Down Syndrome. My first thought is she must have me confused with someone else. As the conversation continues she hasnt said oh Im sorry I called you by accident. So its really about me and my baby. She sets me up for genetic counseling and they tell me it could be a false positive but the percent of false positives out of a hundred is 8%. I am thinking thats not a high percentage for false positives. She tells me how children with down syndrome have mental retardation and how they look different and how they run a 50% chance of needing heart surgery at birth and other medical problems they may encounter. So I know that I should be positive and believe in the power of prayer but its just not enough to keep those negative thought out of my mind. So I ask myself if the worst is true and my baby does have a genetic disorder am I wrong for thinking that I would want to terminate my pregnancy.I just dont know how I would handle a child with special needs. I am having enough trouble dealing with my 5 kids now. I hate not knowing yet I am scared to find out. What if he says lets have the baby anyway... I really dont know what I will do. Maybe I am running ahead of myself with this but I have to think of all the possible scenarios. Everyone keeps telling me not to worry but I just want to scream. How am I not suppossed to worry??? Its easier said then done. I am just so confused. |
| |
| Its so funny how many little minded people in this world who think they are so righteous. Dont they know better than to start with the members of my family. We may not always see eye to eye but Lord forbid someone start with one of us. You have unleashed the wrath of us all. So i think we got our point across and broke this B!TCH DOWN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
My sisters I love you so much and I will cut down anyone who tries to disrespect you. I will always have your back. |
| |
| Ok so I went to the doctor yesterday for a prenatal visit and what does she tell...I gained more weight than I was supposed to. I was suppose to gain only 3lbs and I gained 5. WTD!!!! I tell my sperm donor what the doctor said and all he could say was its only 2lbs and since is the last time you going to be pregnant enjoy....but then if I do get big as a house and can't lose it after do you think he still going to be ok with it. I dont think so!!!! Ughhh maybe I am being unreasonable but I am pregnant and am allowed to be unreasonable aren't I?????
So now I am going to have to figure out how I am only going to gain 1lb this month so that I can even out the weight gain from last month so once again UGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH.....
Tonight is PTC at Anthony's school lets see what the teache rhas to say about my lil genius...but am not looking foward to the big kids PTC next week
On the bright side tonight is SHot of Love and am so looking foward to it...I am so hooked on reality TV. I mayneed help lol...well will keep you posted on this yucky wieght thing |
| |
| Fruck you betch!!!!! Heres your update!!!!!!!!!!!!!1 |
| |
